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the latest update is ‘Pawprints’ on 11th March 2010

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A doctor was having an affair with his nurse, who became pregnant.  Not wanting his wife to find out, he gave the nurse some money and told her to go to Italy for the birth.  'But how will I let you know when the baby is born?' she asked.
'Just send me a postcard and write 'spaghetti' on it,' he told her.
Six months went by then a postcard arrived.  The doctor read it and had a heart attack.  He was rushed to casualty where the wife was asked what had precipitated the cardiac arrest.  The wife handed over the card which read.  'Spaghett - spaghetti - spaghetti. Two with sausage and meatballs - one without'.
                                   courtesy of  Mark Robberts

A SPANISH Teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine.
'House' for instance, is feminine: 'la casa.'  'Pencil,' however, is masculine: 'el lapiz.'

A student asked, 'What gender is 'computer'?'

Instead of giving the answer, the teacher split the class into two groups, male and female, and asked them to decide for themselves whether computer' should be a masculine or a feminine noun. Each group was asked to give four reasons for its recommendation.

The men's group decided that 'computer' should definitely be of the feminine gender ('la
computadora'), because:
1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic;
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else;
3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval; and
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your pay check on accessories for it.

(THIS GETS BETTER!)
The women's group, however, concluded that computers should be Masculine ('el computador'), because: 1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on;
2. They have a lot of data but still can't think for themselves;
3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem; and
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.

The women won.
                                   courtesy of  Mark Robberts